Sunday, October 31, 2004

Giant Douche versus Turd Sandwich

The creators of South Park continue to bring us some of the most astute political commentary on television. Here’s some dialogue from last week’s episode:
MRS. MARSH: How was school today, Stanley?
STAN: It was ridiculous. We have to have a new school mascot and we're supposed to choose between a giant douche and a turd sandwich.
MRS. MARSH: What did you say?
MR. MARSH: Did you just say that voting is ridiculous?
STAN: No, I think voting is great, but if I have to choose between a douche and a turd, I just don’t see the point.
MR. MARSH: You don’t see the point? Oh, you young people just make me sick!
MRS. MARSH: Stanley, do you know how many people died so you could have the right to vote?
STAN: Well Mom, I just don’t think there’s much of a difference between a douche and a turd. I don’t care.
MR. MARSH: You don’t care! You really want a turd sandwich as your school mascot, on your football helmets, a turd!
MRS. MARSH: Well hold on Randy, I think a turd sandwich is a little better than them having a douche on their uniforms.
MR. MARSH: You’re crazy. A douche is at least clean!
MRS. MARSH: It’s sexist is what it is!
MR. MARSH: You don’t understand the issues, Sharon!
And how’s this for commentary on the motivations of Sean Penn, P. Diddy, and others urging young people to vote?
KYLE: Kenny, we have got to make Stan understand the importance of voting, because he’ll definitely vote for our guy.
Eventually, a reluctant Stan decides to vote. The entire election is held up for his vote, which he casts amid great fanfare. The result?
Stan’s vote brings the total votes for turd sandwich to 36, and giant douche has 1,410. Giant douche still wins!
That’s right, every vote counts. Now get out there and vote on November 2nd!


Anonymous said...

Stan had to vote to make the ironic futility come full circle. Thanks, Glen, for the humor and for the encouragement to vote no matter how futile it is for each of us to do it independently. You've made your civic contributions above and beyond the call of duty via your witty commentary. Therefore, I absolve you, my son, of having to vote (though I suspect you will anyway). Besides watching South Park, what other raunchy Libertarian activities are you engaged in? Need I ask? You have my blessing to trash President Kerry as you see fit!

--The Almighty

Anonymous said...

Yes, go ahead and trash President Kerry.